life eats death and death eats life.
Current mood: determined
Category: Life

Death eats life and life eats death and so it goes....on and on. I lost another friend this week. another friend who was good. a shining light in this sinning, dark, light dimming world. I could ponder the reason behind the good ones dying but there is no point. no reason. it is what it is and that is all there is. He was a twin. the only one of two left. his brother died when he was a small child and he lived on to the ripe old age of forty one. he was good, he was kind, he was intelligent and he was my friend. what else can I say? I do not believe in God and this makes it all the more clear that there is no such thing as an omnipotent being who wants you to be good. goodness is not rewarded. I am trying my damnedest to find some spiritual outtake in all this. the only conclusion that I can come to is that though goodness is not rewarded by any so called "higher power" it is definitely appreciated by those who are close to you and who love you and you love in return. If I can make an effort to set an example by being honest and kind if at all possible, then I will. My dear George Pequignot, I will moo for the kids, I will smile at a stranger and I will try to know each and every person who I come into close contact with. if that would not have made you smile, I do not know what would have.

another conclusion that I have come to, one that I came to last summer through the death of my friend Sean Johnson...death brings us together. makes us remember to love one another, because life is fleeting and we tend to forget that. we tend to forget that our peepholes could be closed at any time(R.I.P Kurt Vonnegut, I am glad I got to know you when I did). through many circumstances, we could lose a loved one, an acquaintance that we could have learned to love and most of all, ourselves. we get a hundred years at best...let us make the most of it.

oh. one more thing. on the idea of life eats death and death eats life. I mentioned above that George was a twin. that he, like his twin died at a young age, left the world behind yet still in his short time here managed to leave his mark the way he was meant to do. the thing that intrigues me about this is that a good friend of mine who lost a child who was only five years of age, a woman who vowed to never have children again,told me this week that she is pregnant...with twins. oh how the world works. it mirrors itself on and on, trying to evolve yet still finding ways to bring more light in, in an attempt to make the darkness more bearable... on and on forever, giving and taking, killing and growing and the only faith we can have is in ourselves and in eachother. AMEN.

p.s. for those of you who know the woman that I have mentioned above, please for the respect of her family and our friendship, do not mention this knowledge I have dropped unless she mentions it first. it is her life, not mine...the parallel just struck me is all.

til' next time...

-Freckles the brain, the heart Martinez